Her: Hey Maria and Sara said don't ask them any questions or I'll beat you up

Me: I thought we were friends. Traitor.

Her: We are friends.. I love my buddy!!!
Are you still my friend?
Please!

Me: It's over. It is over now. FUck you! How dare you, I've done nothing but be nice to you.

Her: Omg no it can't be over... But your the only person that gets me.. Now I'm gonna slit my wrists

Me: Mel Gibson says Hi

Her: Hello???
I'm acting like a desperate girlfriend now...Geez

Me: Hold it's hard to text and fashion a noose.

Her: No please don't I don't think I could get over it :)

Me: As you smile callously! GBCW! DNR!

Her: I have to tell you something but I'm scared and your going to not talk to me anymore if I tell you

Me: You had a scissorfest in the mcdonalds ball pit. ask your new bffs to decode.

Her: I don't know why that means

Me: Goodbye cruel world. Do not resuscitate.
Why do you do this to me? I give you pussy doodles from old country and you no care.

Her: So if I were to tell you something would u hate me?

Me: No more than I hate myself

Her: Ok I'm just gonna tell you
I totally have an innocent crush on you... That's so lame I'm sorry

Me: Again, like mcdonalds, you can do better!
Her: What no
I do I'm sorry. I like you and it's lame
Please don't feel weird about it
I really like you
Are you still my friend?

Me: Yes silly. I like you too.
Her: Really?
I really like you
I know I'm married but after hanging out with you it's better
Your awesome
<3
Ok sorry
I'm dumb and I don't want to ruin our friendship
I can stop by today if you want
If just to say hi
No I'm here and I want to see you
Please?

Me: All right no worries.

Her: Ok I'll atop by on my way out just to see you... Cuz Ur my favorite
I'm excited to see you
Is that ok? Am I making you feel uncomfortable?

Me: No it's fine I was picking up.